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Funny Quotes

40 Funny Quotes Of The Day And Short Funny Sayings

“11. When you’re drunk and about to pass out, but your friends say, “wanna go to taco bell?” so you’re like…let’s ride…”

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“12. That moment when you spell a word so wrong that even auto correct is like, I’ve got nothing man!.”

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“13. I was born to make mistakes. … Not to fake perfection.”

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“14. If my body was a car I’d trade it in for a newer model. Cause every time I cough or sneeze, my radiator leaks and my exhaust backfires.”

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“15. I prefer not to think before speaking. I like being just as surprised as everyone else by what comes out of my mouth.”

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“16. I made a huge to do list for today. I just can’t figure out who’s going to do it.”

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“17. Screw the padded room give me a trampoline floor with bubble wrapped walls and Velcro ceiling.”

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“18. Nope, can’t go to hell satan still has that restraining order against me!!!.”

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“19. “Did you just fall?” “Noo. I attacked the floor.””

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“20. “He’s 24 months old” 2. Your child is 2.”

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