Top 100 Funniest Quotes and Funny Photos

Top Funniest Quotes and Funny Photos That Will Make Your Day With Laugh and Share with your friends and Family. LOL so true! OMG Quotes will help you every time you need a little extra laugh and fun.

Funniest Quotes

♥ “I wish my wallet came with free refills.

♥ “According to most studies, people’s number one fear is public speaking. Number two is death. Death is number two. Does that seem right?

♥ “Not sure which is harder on a relationship: sharing a dresser for three years or sharing an iPhone charger for one day.

♥ “I just realized that ‘let me check my calendar’ is the adult version of ‘let me ask my mom.’

♥ “Do you ever go out, and while you’re out, you think, this is exactly why I don’t go out?

♥ “How coffee makes me εγγι 10 of the funniest quotes ever!

♥ “I recently asked a student where his homework was. He replied, ‘It’s still in my pencil.’

♥ “If you’re hotter than me, then that means I’m cooler than you.

♥ “So I guess your long hair makes you a woman. So I guess your wooden leg makes you a table.

♥ “If you are not yelling at your kids, you are not spending enough time with them.

♥ “The exact moment my dog realizes I have a camera…

♥ “Life always offers you a second chance, it’s called tomorrow.

♥ “When life hands you lemons make grape juice. Then sit back and watch as the world wonders how you did it.

♥ “User: the word computer professionals use when they mean ‘idiot.’

♥ “Sometimes, I use big words I don’t always fully understand to make myself sound more.

♥ “Farting is like the song from Frozen. Work: conceal, don’t feel, don’t let them know… At home: let it go! Let it go! Can’t hold it back anymore….♥ “Don’t carry your mistakes around with you. Instead, place them under your feet and use them as stepping stones to rise above them.

♥ “It’s cute when you wink at me, but next time, could you use one of your eyes? 28 Funny quotes

♥ “An optimist is someone who falls off the empire state building, and after 50 floors ssay ‘sofar so good!’

♥ “I am going to succeed because I am crazy enough to think that I can.

♥ “Smile and let everyone know that today, you are a lot stronger than you were yesterday

♥ “He has no enemies but is intensely disliked by his friends.

♥ “But hheremMozart you were writing symphonies when you were eight. “Yes,” said mozart. But I never asked anybody.

♥ “If I worked at a restaurant on vValentine’sdDay I’d put a fake engagement ring in every girl’s drink! – Unknown

♥ “Next time a stranger talks to you when you’re alone, just look at them shocked and whisper, you can see me?

♥ “The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces. Will rogers

♥ “If at first, you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried. Steven wright

♥ “I don’t mean to interrupt people I just randomly remember things and get excited

♥ “People say you can’t live without love……. I think oxygen is more important.

I Am Gym Man

♥ “All I know I learned from family guy श्र a quahog is a clam. Dogs and babies can talk, and land listens to them. Death is no good with the ladies. Rodolf’s nose is red because of a tumor. When you’re beautiful doors magically open for you. Fat chicks need loving too, but they have to pay. Don’t take coupons from giant chickens. GGreased-up deaf guys are impossible to catch. Don’t accept popsicles from weird old men. Evil monkeys aren’t as evil as they seem. Pimples, however, are very evil. Purgatory isn’t great, but it isn’t either. Everything works out if you do whatever you want, don’t trust people in checkered suits. Don’t buy volcano insurance. You can’t eat a stapler. Don’t do ‘toad. Tv is freakin’ sweet. Petitions work. No fat chicks.

♥ “If robbers ever broke into my house and searched for money. I’d just laugh at b.com/minionquote and search despicablememinions.org with tcontrolшем be brave. Even if you’re not, pretend to be.

♥ “Oh shut the fuck up and have a drink. ~ I as a therapist

♥ “Someone’s therapist knows all about you. Whinnan

♥ “There are no bad pictures that are just how your face looks sometimes. -Abraham Lincoln

♥ “You can put lipstick on a pig. It’s still a pig. Barrack Obama

♥ “II don’thave attitude cha problem just persona you can’t handle!

♥ “People talk about having an inner child. I don’t. I have an inner old lady who says inappropriate things, tells everyone to be quiet, and wants to go to bed at 88 pm

♥ “Jun ffixturesfun pictures I’m safe in the knowledge that all never get put into the nuthouse..Because my doctor says that I’ll be a bad influence on the rest of the patients!

♥ “I’m sorry and my bad means the same thing… Unless you are at a funeral.

♥ “Why do people say grow some balls? Balls are weak & sensitive! If you really wanna get tough, grow a vagina, those things take a pounding! Betty white.

♥ “If life gives you lemons make some kind of fruity juice. Conan O’Brien

♥ “Today I will live in the moment unless it’s unpleasant in which case I will eat a cookie! -Cookie monster

♥ “When people cut you down or talk behind your back, remember, they took time out of their pathetic lives to think about you.

♥ “The best things in life are expensive.