90 Short Funny Valentine’s Day Messages, Love Images and Quotes

Short Funny Valentines Day Messages Love Images and Quotes | Funny valentines day quotes, Cute valentines day quotes, Valentines day quotes for friends

Short Funny Valentine’s Day Messages: Add a little twist to your Valentine’s Day by sending your special someone a funny Valentine’s message. They will never suspect it! Surprise your friends or loved ones with a funny message and see their smile light up the day.

When you’re there, you’re there. If you were able to meet your lovers and celebrate the day with them instead of just giving them gifts, the day would be more meaningful. The message that comes with the gift: This isn’t a Roman tradition, but adding Valentine’s Day text to your gift will make it stand out even more.

As long as you don’t do something too romantic for Valentine’s Day, there are a lot of funny Valentine’s Day quotes that you can find on the internet very quickly. When you write a Valentine’s Day message for your partner or lover, it’s not a big deal.

This Valentine’s Day, you can give more than one gift to more people. It’s hard to write multiple messages for your other loved ones, like your family or friends. It’s also weird to give Valentine’s Day cards that have the same messages on them, isn’t it, because it looks bad.

So, in this post, we’ve compiled 90 of the best Valentine’s Day messages that are sure to give you some ideas. We can help you find words to say to your significant other, your family, or your friends this February 14th.

Funny Valentine Day Messages

1. You are my sun that lights up my life, but also gives me sunburns sometimes. Love you to the sun and back. Happy Valentine’s Day!

2. Happy Valentine’s Day my bae! I have resisted most nice things in my life, but it does seem you are irresistible. Because, you are my only temptation – in every way. Let us enjoy the day.

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short funny valentine day texts

3. I love you more than coffee, but please don’t make me prove it. – Elizabeth Evans

4. I wanted to make it special on Valentine’s Day, so I tied my boyfriend up. And for three solid hours, I watched whatever I wanted on TV. — Tracy Smith

5. To be in love is merely to be in a state of perceptual anesthesia. — H. L. Mencken

6. I have found my way back to your heart like a stray dog finds his way back home. Thank you for letting me in every time. Happy valentine’s day!

7. You don’t always have to arrange candlelight dinners for me on valentine’s day; it’s ok to buy me some jewelry sometimes!

8. I don’t always celebrate valentine’s day, but I make sure I have a fake smile on my face when I do.

Funny Valentine’s Day Messages for Friends

10. We have come a long way and there are only two things that have grown in this wonderful journey… one is our love my dear and the second is your weight…. Happy Valentine’s Day to you my sweet friend…. To grow any further, just let the love grow!!!

11. You know what? Valentine’s Day is for suckers — especially the red cherry heart-shaped kind!

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funny valentines day quotes and valentine sentiments

12. It wasn’t love at first sight. It took a full five minutes.

13. You cannot define love in one word and you cannot celebrate love in one day. That’s why I don’t have any plans with you on this Valentine’s Day!

14. Wishing you Valentine’s Day you’ll love! So, candy, candy, candy, candy? Happy Heart Day, Skyler!

15. Be my valentine and I promise you a chocolate fountain, an imaginary one anyway, I hope you enjoy this time and I apologize for my being broke. Have an awesome time.

16. Roses are red and so are you, when you blush next to me I feel so good. Happy Valentines Day my sweetheart, you are the best part of any day!

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Funny Valentine Messages For Him

18. Your eyes are like a smoldering flame, your kiss is like a spark, and your embrace is like a blazing fire. Happy Valentine’s Day to my red hot lover!

19. I always thought the perfect guy was a dream. Someone who was made up in a movie or a book. But I realize even more so on this Valentine’s Day that my perfect man is you.

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funny valentines day card messages

20. I’ve been thinking so hard to tell you how much I’ve loved you, I wish I was there when they gave birth to you; I’ll just marry you straight away. Happy Valentine’s Day love.

21. Love is a lot like a backache: it doesn’t show up on X-rays, but you know it’s there.

22. Every day with you is Valentine’s, that’s why I don’t have any special gift for you today.

23. Ewe woolly stole my heart. And it’s a sheer delight, Babe!

24. If you feel lonely today, just remind yourself that yesterday you felt the same as today, and tomorrow will not be different either. Happy valentine’s day!

25. Dear friend, wishing you a happy valentine’s day. I hope you will enjoy yourself with your girlfriend since she won’t leave you to accompany your friends for a night out party.

Funny Valentine Messages For Her

27. It doesn’t mean you are my girlfriend (boyfriend) or anything like that. I just like your eyes and your smile! 🙂

28. This Valentine’s Day won’t pass you by, For Cupid’s flying in the sky. He sees the love I have for you, His arrow’s sharp, and the aim is true. He’ll never miss so nor shall I, I’ll love you till the day I die.

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funny valentines day messages for friends

29. Every day I fall more in love with you. Except on those days, you piss me off… (fortunately, today is not that day!)

30. Valentine is a day for a child with an arrow to go around shooting people, this is my apology for not taking you out, I don’t want to be a victim too. Have a hearty valentine regardless.

31. I had a crush on so many guys, but you were the most handsome among all of them. So you are the luckiest guy who got me right beside you. Happy Valentine’s day!

32. I have never seen any place where a bike stands on its own? Because it is two-tired. I will be too tired to live my life without you. Happy Valentine’s Day my life. Let’s enjoy.

33. Good shot, Cupid, good shot. Love you, Valentine!

Funny Valentine Wishes for Singles

35. People say life is a race, but run at your own pace. However, I can’t even walk without you with me in this race. You have become my legs, and my every single thing. Happy Valentine’s Day, love.

36. Don’t forget how we look now. Some day, we will get wrinkly and old. However, the best part about it is we will get wrinkly and old together. Happy Valentine’s, love!

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funny valentine wishes for singles

37. What do you call the world’s smallest Valentine? A Valen-tiny!

38. I need to upgrade the power of my glasses because I’m blindly in love with you.

39. This Valentine I am officially requesting you to leave my head, I can’t stop thinking about you.

40. Today is February 14th – St. Valentine’s day. Women call it Love day, while men name it extortion day.

41. I am that secret of your life which you can never hide. But you play with my heart I know well. Happy Valentine.

42. I just want to be friends. Plus a little extra. Also, I love you.

43. You don’t need flowers to smell sweet and don’t need ornaments to look beautiful. And then I thought you don’t need a valentine’s day either to be loved!

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Funny Valentines Day Text

45. Love is blind – this is so true. How mad I am to fall in love with you. Bah – never mind! Happy Valentine’s to you.

46. Your farts are your cutest feature, except for the days we eat radishes. Then, baby, I want to kick you out. Happy Valentine’s Day, dear!

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funny valentine quotes for wife and husband

47. If my wealth grew as much as my love for you, today, I’d be on the Forbes list of richest men in the world. Happy valentine’s day!

48. I was single and sad. And then I met you and realized being single was not so bad. Just kidding! Happy valentine’s day, my love!

49. I wish I could strip your clothes off tonight like the way you strip a bar of wrapped chocolate. I wish I was with you tonight. Happy valentine’s day sweetheart!

50. My friends are the weirdest, craziest people I know but I love them. Happy Valentines’ Day everyone!

51. I see your face in every cow. Please lose some pounds for me. Happy Valentine Day.

52. You are the sun that lights up my days, but also gives me sunburns. Love you to the sun’s heat and back, Happy Valentine’s Day!

53. Valentine, I pick you. Every single day. Love, Riley

Funny Valentines Day Quotes

55. “And when you smile, the whole world stops and stares for a while, ’cause you’re amazing, just the way you are.” – Bruno Mars (Just The Way You Are)

56. “You are pretty much the only thing that makes me want to get up in the morning.” – Me Before You

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funny valentine quotes for gf and bf

57. My phone battery lasts longer than most of my relationships nowadays. — Jacques Torres

58. When you see a married couple walking down the street, the one that’s a few steps ahead is the mad one. – Helen Rowland

59. I hope you have prepared the best valentine’s day gift for your best friend!

60. Happy Valentine’s Day. I can’t imagine how lucky you are to be married to me!

61. If you remain single for the next 2 years, you should consider dating yourself. Because you are one of a kind and there’s no one like you!

62. I love you like a lazy guy loves his bed in the morning. I want you like a monkey wants a banana and I crave for you as a fat boy craves for chocolates.

63. Happy Valentine’s Day my love, I have resisted all things in my life, but it seems you’re irresistible because you’re my only temptation in every way. Let’s enjoy the day.

Funny Valentine Quotes for GF and BF

65. Roses are red, and baby, so are you, when you blush, I feel so good. Happy Valentine’s day, bugs bunny. You are the best part of my day!

66. Let’s go to the bedroom and lose some weight. Happy Valentine’s day.

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funny valentine messages for friends

67. Before I met you, I’m full of weight, but now I have shed lots of weight. You’re the best weight management, therapist. Now let’s go inside to lose more weight. Happy Valentine’s Day.

68. When people ask me what the best thing about you is, I say nothing. I don’t want them to fall in love with you. Happy valentine’s Day!

69. You can’t put a price tag on love. But if you could, I’d wait for it to go on sale.

70. Money can not buy love but it can buy lots of love

71. Don’t be so cool when you are with me, you look so foolish. Happy Valentine Day.

Funny Valentine Quotes For Wife and Husband

73. I cannot forget your selfless endeavors and commitment towards my cause; you are an accurate reflection of Valentine; I am glad to have a loving grandma in you.

74. My boy is growing up into a fine young man; I hope you’ll forever celebrate Valentine with love. Have a grand one dear!

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funny valentine messages card sayings

75. Love is like a blanket. It will keep you warm and safe for some time but very soon you’ll realize that it was an electric blanket and someone else is in control of the switch!

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76. Girlfriends are temporary, friends are permanent. Accept this truth, my friend. Let’s spend this Valentine’s Day high on drugs and drunk as a lord!

77. Pudgy baby child with a bow and arrow? No one sees that coming.

78. Most women desire someone who makes them laugh and also feels safe. So basically a clown ninja.

79. Roses are red, fitness is great, I would’ve gotten you chocolate, but you need to lose some weight.

Best Funny Valentine’s Day Images With Quotes

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cute funny valentine messages and quotes

Valentine’s Day card ideas for the 14th of February, as well as sentiments to include in the cards

You are an essential part of my body’s nutritional needs. If it weren’t for you, I would be suffering from osteoporosis right now. Wishing you a very happy Valentine’s Day, my dear love.

There are no words to express how much I appreciate you beyond what my bathroom slipper could ever fathom.

The frosting on my doughnut and the sugar sprinkled on my cake are all because of you! Valentine, I’m head over heels in love with you!

You didn’t take my heart; instead, you hacked your way into my skull. When I’m with you, I’m so absorbed in our conversation that I forget my name. I wish you a very happy Valentine’s Day, my dear kid.

I swear that I am not planning anything illegal. The latter is particularly true when I’m alone with you!

I don’t usually go out on Valentine’s Day, but when I do it’s with someone as beautiful as you, which is a rare occasion!

It appears that even God was unable to locate you a suitable companion after all these years. Perhaps she hasn’t even been born yet, or perhaps she hails from the planet Mars. Everyone had a wonderful Valentine’s Day!

Even though some people believe that life is a race and that you should proceed at your own pace, I couldn’t even walk if you weren’t beside me in this race. You’ve taken on the role of my legs and everything else that goes with it. I want to wish you a very happy Valentine’s Day, my darling.

Everyone should have a happy Valentine’s Day. This list contains stuff that you should get for me as a thank you for being the best boyfriend that the world has ever known.

Because I’m on a diet, I don’t need a lot of candy on Valentine’s Day, which is convenient for me. You might instead spend your money on diamonds for me, which would be much more beneficial!

Never forget how we looked today; one day we will be old and wrinkled, but the best part about it will be that we will be old and wrinkled in the same spot at the same time, which will be quite wonderful. My sweetie, I wish you a very happy Valentine’s Day!

My life was lived as if nothing else mattered to me except my friends before meeting you; my life is now lived as if nothing else matters except you. Because of this, I’ve been ignoring my social network. I wish you a very happy Valentine’s Day, my darling.

Not that money or your well-being is more important to me than you or your well-being is implied by this statement. Although my father believes that spending money on good projects is important, I should follow his advice! Everyone had a wonderful Valentine’s Day!

Nobody I have ever met is more romantic and loving in their personal life than you. I have never encountered anyone like you. Perhaps this explains why you have been a single woman for so long?

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You bring out the best in me, which is something that not many individuals can accomplish. Although I will be monitoring you from a distance since you do not know who I am, I am extremely familiar with you. I hope you have a wonderful time today! My crush sends his best wishes for a joyous Valentine’s Day.

You become depressed when you realize that you will not be spending Valentine’s Day with a certain someone. Better spend the day with me, and best of luck in the new year, my friend.

The brain is the most astounding of all the organs since it is capable of so many things. It is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, from the moment you are born till the moment you fall in love.

A fart is a fart, and love is a fart, as well as a fart. If you try to force it, it will turn out to be a complete disaster. Please have a nice Valentine’s Day, my good friend.

Whatever you do, don’t make any long-term commitments. You’ll be dead for a very long period before you pass away. Everyone had a wonderful Valentine’s Day!

Just now, I’ve realized that I’ve fallen in love with someone much more deeply than I had imagined at first sight. Allow me to make a Valentine’s Day confession to you, please!

If I can take your clothes off tonight in the same way you would take a bar of wrapped chocolate out of its wrapper, I’ll consider it a success. I truly regret that I was unable to join you for dinner tonight. You have a nice Valentine’s Day, my sweetie.

Please accept my warmest wishes for a very happy Valentine’s Day from the bottom of my heart.

You have my heartfelt greetings on Valentine’s Day. During the night, my beloved teddy bear, you are always there for me, bringing the warmth and comfort that I need. Wishing you a very happy Valentine’s Day, my sweet pillow!

Medical insurance does not cover the expense of a shattered heart, which is unfortunate for me. So please don’t ever leave me alone in the future. Everyone had a wonderful Valentine’s Day!

I believe you have not only stolen my heart but have also completely enslaved me and separated me from myself! Everyone should have a happy Valentine’s Day.

I’d want to say hello to everyone and everything in my life. Let me emphasize that life is brief, therefore let us love one other for the rest of our lives, no matter how tough it may seem at the time. Take advantage of this beautiful day by spending time with me.

Bring on the good wine, the good food, and most of all the good company of lovely friends like you to celebrate Valentine’s Day.

Make yourself available to me at all times. I’ll be a boo-hoo if that doesn’t happen! Would you be interested in being my Valentine?

Love is blind, and this is a statement that is quite true. It’s hard for me to comprehend that I’m falling in love with you although I’m enraged. Never mind, I’ve had enough of it! I’d want to wish you a very happy Valentine’s Day.

Valentine’s Day is one day, and the rest of the days are spent with other individuals who are important to one’s commitment.

Hopefully, God will fill your heart with love and your wallet with money, allowing you to spoil your honey with some chocolates on her birthday! Everyone had a wonderful Valentine’s Day!

At the moment, I was alone and depressed, and I couldn’t help myself. I met you, and it dawned on me that being single wasn’t that bad after all. I’m not serious about this! I want to wish you a very happy Valentine’s Day, my darling!

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I’m head over heels in love with you. But, what precisely is your given name? LOL. Have a lovely Valentine’s Day, little one.

I wasn’t kissing her; instead, I was whispering in her ear about something.

Your capacity to munch on my thoughts like a piece of chocolate is something I find intriguing. Only a matter of days before your passion renders me utterly unable to operate as a result of my adoration!

It looks to be a great deal of pleasure to celebrate Valentine’s Day in movies. Although this is true in theory, in practice it is both painful and costly. Try purchasing a bouquet and you’ll understand what I’m talking about!

I’m wishing my huggy bear a very happy Valentine’s Day based on your kissy expression. I just adore you!

It is with great anticipation that I look forward to eating you regularly. Greetings, and best wishes for the most romantic day of your life. Everyone should have a happy Valentine’s Day.

It’s just a handful of things in life that I look forward to ripping their clothes off when I get married, and you’re one of those things. I can’t express how much I admire you. Everyone should have a happy Valentine’s Day.

My heartiest congratulations on your engagement, my sweetheart. The fact that you were finally able to love me means that I may die in peace, and I hope that we can do so together. But, first and foremost, let us have pleasure in the present.

Everyone should have a happy Valentine’s Day. In the hopes of preventing you from getting on my nerves on Valentine’s Day, I have sent you this letter.

Your ravenous hunger will not be satisfied by chocolates, therefore I will get you a meal instead of them. I’m hoping that you’ll agree to accompany me on Valentine’s Day date with my boyfriend.

The day before you, Valentine’s Day meant absolutely nothing to me, and it continues to mean absolutely nothing to me today as well. But I still have feelings for you.

One of a man’s most important responsibilities is to protect his wife from her urge to “get bangs” every other month.

Every day, I adore you a little bit more than a s’more, and it’s all because of you. Valentine, you are the embodiment of the deliciousness that makes my mouth water!

All that is necessary is a little bit of love. However, a small amount of chocolate now and again isn’t going to hurt.

In the same manner that I enjoy soft drinks, I admire you as well. I’d want to wish you a very happy Valentine’s Day.

In addition to being my wife, you also serve as my commander-in-chief and, sometimes, my mother. You are the center of my universe. You frighten me, but in the best possible way a fearful person could be afraid is how you terrify me. Best wishes to my wonderful wife on this special day of love and romance!

It’s possible that you won’t find someone to fall in love with, but at the very least, your wallet will remain secure. Don’t take your existence for granted, guy. I’ve already started to feel a little envious of you!

According to this definition, love is a foolish emotion, therefore I must be an even bigger fool for having fallen in love with the most beautiful person on the planet, in my view! Everyone had a wonderful Valentine’s Day!

Magnification should be increased. Keep it where it is. Continue to hold… Continue to hold… Continue to hold… Forever is a beautiful thing.

I always seem to end up with a hole in my pocket on Valentine’s Day, and it takes me the entire year to patch it back up. It gives me great relief to know that you are still single!

Friends that are truly kind and supportive are the finest Valentines a person could ask for.

Valentine’s Day is a concept of which I am already aware. When the nude newborn shoots you with an arrow, you immediately fall in love with her.

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Your jobs as a robber and a drug dealer are all performed at the same time. To avoid losing my heart, you have also made me reliant on your kindness. I want to wish you a very happy Valentine’s Day, my darling husband.

Unlike other individuals, I do not believe that love can be blinded by its passion and desire. Your love has opened my eyes to all of your imperfections, and yet I continue to love you despite these revelations. I want to wish you a very happy Valentine’s Day, my darling.

I’m sure you’ve experienced the tingling sensation that comes with being in a relationship with someone. That is the sound of your common sense being expelled from your body if you will.

It is you who is the center of my entire world. Whenever I’m with you, I even forget about going to the zoo at all. Greetings, my sweetheart, and best wishes for a very happy Valentine’s Day!

As of right now, I’m having a terrific time with my partner; I just wanted to check-in and see how you were doing today. What is it like to have the impression that you are dating yourself? I can’t wait to find out the answer!

When it comes to explaining my feelings for you, I find myself at a loss for words. Maybe it’s simply my clumsy expression. On this Valentine’s Day, please accept my greetings and best wishes.

If my riches grew at the same rate as my feelings for you now, I’d be on the Forbes list of the world’s wealthiest men by the time you were born. Everyone had a wonderful Valentine’s Day!

If you put iced tea and Moon Pies together, you’ll be even better! Babe, you have my heartfelt affection!

In addition, I am single for the first time in my life this year.

When people inquire about my plans for Valentine’s Day, as if they are completely unaware that I am single, it makes me happy to hear their questions.

To be feared or loved, which do you think I’d prefer? Both are simple. I want others to be terrified of how much they adore me because of how much they adore them.

When was the last time you heard that Valentine’s Day was just for lovers? Who said that? My best friend, you have my greatest devotion and gratitude! Everyone should have a happy Valentine’s Day.

What is it about being in love with you that has to be so toxically beautiful to be true? Every day, I pray that you will see me, and today, I will stand squarely in front of you so that you will not miss me, your valentine, as you pass by.

Wishing you a very happy Valentine’s Day, and may it cause you to wag your tail with delight. If you were to have one, it would be something like this:

Are you a piece of literature from the library, young lady? Because I can’t seem to stop thinking about you and seeking for you! LOVING YOU is a bizarre and unpredictable experience that sends me on an emotional roller coaster ride. Everyone had a wonderful Valentine’s Day!

It is vital to fall in love with the same person more than once to establish a successful relationship.

Do you want to know what I have planned for the rest of the afternoon? Making you accountable for stealing my heart is a top priority for me right now. I want to wish you a very happy Valentine’s Day, my darling!

Valentine’s Day isn’t something I celebrate regularly, but when I do, I make an effort to put on a fake grin to commemorate the holiday.

Because I am so attractive, we make the most attractive couple on the face of the planet. Everyone should have a happy Valentine’s Day.

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Mr. Walker, I wish you the best of success today as you try to figure out who sent you this Valentine’s Day greeting card. Thank you so much for putting your heart and soul into your teaching for our benefit!

It wasn’t a case of falling head over heels in love at first sight for me. It took me a total of five minutes to finish the assignment.

A single word cannot adequately describe love, and a single day cannot adequately commemorate love, as they both fail to do so. As a result of this scenario, I am unable to make any plans with you for Valentine’s Day shortly.

I wish you Valentine’s Day that you will remember for a long time! To summarise: enjoy your Valentine’s Day chocolates to the fullest extent possible!

If you choose to be my Valentine, I will provide you with a chocolate fountain, albeit an imaginary one, as a thank you. Hope you enjoy yourself, and please accept my regrets for my unable to attend due to financial constraints. Make use of the situation to the best extent possible.

When the roses are red, you are crimson as well, and when you flush next to me, it makes me feel fantastic. My sweetheart, I wish you a very happy Valentine’s Day since you are the highlight of every day!

My thoughts on how to communicate my love for you have been swirling about in my head for quite some time. Your parents gave birth to you and I wish I could have been there to see it. I’m going to pop the question to you right now. Have a nice Valentine’s Day, everyone.

The feeling of love is akin to back pain in that it is not visible on X-rays, yet you are aware that it is present.

When I’m with you, it feels like Valentine’s Day is celebrated every day, which is why I don’t have anything special to give you today.

Despite my reservations, Ewe Woolly managed to capture my heart. Also, it’s a complete delight for you, my darling!

If you are feeling lonely today, remind yourself that you felt the same way yesterday and that you will feel the same way tomorrow as well. Everyone had a wonderful Valentine’s Day!

Greetings, Dear Friend I’d want to wish you a very happy Valentine’s Day from the bottom of my heart. Because she will not be accompanying you to a night out party with her friends, I hope you and your partner have a wonderful time together.

For a child with an arrow, Valentine’s Day is the perfect opportunity to go about murdering people. If you don’t mind accepting my apologies for not bringing you out earlier; I don’t want you to become another victim. Whatever you do, make your Valentine’s Day a hearty one.

In high school, I had several crushes on a variety of different males, but you were, in my view, the most handsome of all of them. As a result, you are the luckiest man on the planet to have me seated right next to you. Everyone had a wonderful Valentine’s Day!

In all my years of riding, I’ve never come into a circumstance where a bicycle could stand on its own. It is two-tired, to be more specific. I’ll be too fatigued to carry on with my life if you don’t come along. Wishing you a very happy Valentine’s Day from the depths of my heart. Let’s take it easy for a while.

Cupid, you’ve hit the nail on the head with that shot. Valentine, I’m head over heels in love with you!

What do you think the world’s tiniest Valentine should be called? You could be perplexed. To be more specific, a Valen-tiny.

For the simple reason that I’m over heels in love with you, I need to strengthen the lenses of my spectacles.

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To respect your privacy on this Valentine’s Day, I respectfully request that you kindly leave my thoughts alone since I can’t stop thinking about you.

All I want is to be friends with you, and that is all I want. plus a smidgeon extra bit on top of that In addition, you are my favorite person on the planet.

To make your home smell wonderful, you don’t need flowers, and you don’t need ornaments to make your home seem beautiful. And then I learned that you don’t have to wait for a holiday like Valentine’s Day to be appreciated.

My friends are some of the oldest and wildest people I’ve ever encountered, but they are also some of my favorite people on the planet. I hope that everyone has a lovely Valentine’s Day today!

Every cow has your face on it, and I can tell which ones are which. Could you please lose a few pounds in my honor? I’d want to wish you a very happy Valentine’s Day.

My days are illuminated by your presence, which also causes me to become sunburned. The warmth of the sun extends to the depths of the ocean, wishing you a happy Valentine’s Day!

Valentine, you are the one I have picked for myself. Riley’s warm welcomes may be found on every single day of the week.

Allow me to express my congratulations for putting together the most thoughtful Valentine’s Day gift for your best friend!

Everyone should have a happy Valentine’s Day. How fortunate you are to be married to someone as wonderful as I am is beyond comprehension to me!

If you intend to be single for the next two years, you should carefully consider dating someone else rather than yourself. Because you are one-of-a-kind and there is no one else like you on the planet!

When I initially wake up in the morning, I think of you in the same way as a lazy thinks of his bed. I want you more than anything else in the world, much like a monkey wants bananas, and I want you more than a big boy wants chocolate bars.

My darling, I wish you a very happy Valentine’s Day. In my life, I have fought against everything; however, it appears that you are irresistible because you are the only temptation I have in every aspect of my life, including my work. Let’s make the most of this unique chance.

I used to be a slab of fat before I met you, but I’ve shed a large amount of weight since then. I believe you are the best effective weight-loss treatment on the market. Let’s go inside and continue our efforts to lose even more weight. Everyone should have a happy Valentine’s Day.

I never know what to answer when someone asks me what the nicest thing about them is. The first thing I always reply is, “I don’t know.” I don’t want them to fall head over heels in love with you, and I’m not sure how to stop them. Everyone had a wonderful Valentine’s Day!

True love is incomparably valuable and cannot be quantified. However, if you had the opportunity, I’d wait till it goes on sale before purchasing it.

Even though money cannot buy love, it can buy a whole lot of it.

Avoid appearing too cool when you’re with me, or you’ll come across as a complete moron. I’d want to wish you a very happy Valentine’s Day.

Love is like a blanket. It may look to keep you warm and secure for a short while, but you will shortly discover that it was an electric blanket and that someone else was in charge of the switch!

Friendships endure a lifetime, while relationships with women are short-lived. Accept the reality of the situation, my friend. It’s not your fault. To celebrate love and romance, let us spend this Valentine’s Day high on drugs and drunk as a lord.

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